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Post by ghost on Dec 5, 2007 12:14:38 GMT -5
i'm having such a hard time right now.. suddenly someone put one of my youtube videos up on this site called www.cuteoverload.com (it's one of tabitha when she was a baby when she sat up and begged at our backdoor one time.. it was the cutest thing i'd ever seen so i put it up.. along with several others of my kittens at the time..) well, now i've had over 38,000 views over like one day.. and so much haterade with people deciding i'm a 'godless, soulless monster' and cussing me out, posting i'm the meanest worst cat owner ever and to get a fucking life, etc.. i keep having to remove/block users and re explain as people don't read the comments, or the video title for that matter.. anyone who knows us knows tabitha has never wanted for anything in her life.. we literally bought our first house because she had kittens.. but it hurts and gets to me anyway.. i feel like maybe i should've kept my kittens private, the world of people is such a bad place. i'm thinking of taking down my youtubes.. here it is: www.youtube.com/watch?v=fdXmmExNCSoand here: www.cuteoverload.com/anyway.. i'm going into my snowcave. ghost
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Post by ghost on Dec 5, 2007 13:28:56 GMT -5
thanks so much, thumper.. it links to 5 other places now.. you know how hard it is once something's up there to get it back down.. my son says people would take that as admission i am a godless soulless guilty monster.. it just hits home because tabitha pittypat is my baby.. it was getting her & sabrina for mother's day that saved me from my eating disorder, i ate again because i needed to be there to take care of them. i always say they are my little cherubs and they earned their wings saving me.. also i saved tabitha from very unfortunate circumstances.. my last therapist literally tried to get me to leave my kitties alone more saying it would give them something to look forward to.. my coming home.. but i am too ocd about keeping them safe.. i count them over and over all day (since we have tabitha's daughters now too.. there's pix in the kitties thread).. i'm so glad i can come to this forum and remember there are good people, step outside of it and it feels like falling into ice water.. hypothermia sets in so fast.. and here i was just saying in the other thread how i dealt with judgments from others when i was younger.. i don't have what i had back then, i find i cannot cope with the world of people at all anymore.. it is a bad place. ghost p.s. i really like your sig right now..
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Post by sleepflower on Dec 5, 2007 15:29:30 GMT -5
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Post by ghost on Dec 5, 2007 15:54:16 GMT -5
thank you guys so much.. it's up to 44, 000 views now and i'm still deleting & blocking the really bad comments.. i've posted several comments to clarify but not many read them, they just bash away.. they're reading such torture into it.. tabitha just has the power! believe me with that power she has gotten everything she wants.. no one even watches the other videos of the kittens either.. (also they're 7 years old.. some people seem to think i should have shown a better ending for youtube.. there was no youtube to consider back then.. ) anyway.. i'm gonna go take a hot bath now. ghost
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Post by ghost on Dec 5, 2007 18:30:58 GMT -5
thanks mandy.. guess i just don't have the skin for things like this.. as a kid i attached to kitties since humans were unsafe.. but it was so crazy there i couldn't protect them.. as i've said in other threads.. so this pushes my buttons in the worst way.. can't sleep & si thoughts.. thumper called these kind of people the inhumans.. that's perfect. i'm adopting that term.. i've been calling them the humans.. the 3d ones.. haha.. thank goodness for every under appreciated good decent one out there.. like all of you.. ghost
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Post by exiledempath on Dec 7, 2007 17:29:08 GMT -5
hey ghost sorry to hear all the intense family stuff going on, and having to deal with all those you tube @ssh*les. I know there is a way to disable the comments. sorry you're feeling so isolated and alienated. i'll be thinking of you hugs, if okay stephen
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Post by sleepflower on Dec 12, 2007 11:26:25 GMT -5
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Post by ghost on Dec 12, 2007 12:26:13 GMT -5
so sorry, thumper! what happened? ghost
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Post by sleepflower on Dec 12, 2007 15:51:49 GMT -5
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Post by ghost on Dec 13, 2007 12:51:33 GMT -5
we're all human.. sometimes we slight each other without having a clue that we did it, but a real friend will give you a chance.. you know? if she's giving you the silent treatment for some reason she should've let you in on why.. don't you just hate all the games! it's why i'm in a constant state of ocd/paranoia among people.. the inhumans are going to make us pay for our every little mistake i think.. and i seem to be a mistake generator.. i wonder what it's all about? don't let them make you crazy.. especially if that's what you think she's trying to do? ghost
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Post by exiledempath on Dec 16, 2007 17:50:04 GMT -5
hi Thumper, I'm not feeling very articulate at the moment, but I wanted to let you know that I'm sorry you are dealing w/ so much right now. take care, stephen
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lyly
Full Member
Posts: 112
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Post by lyly on Dec 16, 2007 20:23:27 GMT -5
ho people ... i didn t have a lot of friend til Uni ... i had a lot of stories like this you know ... hey are all cruels, no matter what you can do for them... let s foundig the "club of peoples who hate peoples" #big hug time#
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Post by ghost on Dec 18, 2007 13:35:30 GMT -5
ho people ... hey are all cruels, no matter what you can do for them... let s foundig the "club of peoples who hate peoples our old friend, emma, who used to post here said it was like there are those people everyone seems to love.. she called them the sparkleys.. no matter what they do they still are liked.. and then there are people like us.. we somehow end up on our own.. we feel like fizzles.. I HATE the SPARKLEYS!!!! ghost
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Post by ghost on Jan 2, 2008 21:59:06 GMT -5
sorry i've been kinda out of it for a bit.. thank you to thumper for such a kind offer of support in the depressionfest.. here at home things just will never change, but we go through the motions.. what else is there to do? i am turning to hot chocolate as a substitute for alcohol.. after about 10 years of no chocolate, it seems like a treat.. and on these very cold days it warms me inside, not unlike my old russian companion.. so i'm treating myself with starbuck's pretty often.. i just try to focus on what small comforts i can find. i'd go back to therapy if i believed anyone could even help me, but i just don't think it's possible. wounds are healing and i'm sober.. start over again.. ghost
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lyly
Full Member
Posts: 112
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Post by lyly on Jan 3, 2008 9:13:07 GMT -5
Ghost : yeah, I remember..even at Uni ..there's always these people who are doing horrible things but everybody love them no matter what they do .. my flatmate is totally uncorrect, never helps, is totally pretentious, plus she has sex in our hallway, but nobody find this annoying. But our neighbour, a girl, don't dress like everybody and doesn't go out so often, and everybody is telling tales about her, don't like her, etc ..she does nothing ! she never annoyed anyone .. I will never understand people ...
and here's my favourite chocolate recipe, I offer opne to Sophie every Thrusday to celebrate the end of the week, and she does the same for me, it's make me guilty (and generraly I don't eat on Friday ..)coz there's a lot of calories but ..it's Sophie ...
1/ pour hot chocolate 2/ pour marshmallows 3/ pour chantilly cream, all over the top, a mountain of cream 4/ pour little chocolate powder 5/ drink.
YUMMY
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