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Post by ghost on Nov 29, 2007 12:34:12 GMT -5
hey chica! glad to see you around our little board.. these are paper hugs so don't be scared.. haha.. we are all on the fearful/avoidant side here.. but everyone's so supportive.. i also had the raging alcoholic father.. and as you know we share several issues in common.. feel free to post anything you want and if you need any help at all just ask me! ghost/bren xo
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Post by ghost on Nov 29, 2007 19:43:11 GMT -5
invalidation.. to me is the fuel for si.. in fact it is often called the 'disease of invalidation'.. i've been so invalidated by my family i felt literally unreal.
i know what it's like to be erased.. i tried to be quiet and not let anything bother me.. i shut off my feelings.. then they accused me of being cold & unfeeling.. i forget which thread we were all talking about this on recently?
with me i had parents with alcoholism and mental illness.. then an older sister with alcoholism, drug addiction and paranoid schizophrenia.. another sister who cried all the time and a younger brother (the king of the children).. there simply was not enough to go around emotionally and being the least squeaky wheel left me squashed at the bottom of the totem pole.. how could i compete with my sister's insanity? i couldn't..
any problem i developed was too taxing for the family system and was ignored/made invisible/not spoken about, or written off as my being outrageous or selfish.. so the problems i had just worsened in secret over the years.. narcissism causes others to view your problems as mere nothings.. like not real at all, only created on purpose, or something you're doing 'to them'..
sometimes you need to expand your 'family' to friends, others, to get support.. i hope we can help you some with that!
ghost
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lyly
Full Member
Posts: 112
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Post by lyly on Nov 29, 2007 20:57:42 GMT -5
bienvenue Mandy !
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Post by sleepflower on Dec 2, 2007 15:56:41 GMT -5
hi mandy! please excuse typos, my brain ain't working tonight. Great to meet you! (I seem to be typing in anagrams!) Hope you'll like it as much as I do here..the people are great.
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Post by exiledempath on Dec 4, 2007 18:47:03 GMT -5
hey mandy just wanted to welcome you here also
take care
stephen:)
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