Post by ghost on Apr 3, 2007 14:10:28 GMT -5
hi!
i'm waiting for the internet service guys to show up to change our provider.. of course they showed up early to hook up new phone lines and put up the satellite dish.. both times caught us unprepared.. now that i'm ready for them and waiting.. it's a noshow..
on a better note the voting has begun over at sweetaddy for the t-shirt design.. keep your fingers x'd for mine..
hey pete..
sounds like you're on the right track..
it is often true that some therapists do not 'challenge' their clients like others do.. to examine their own part in problematic matters.. in the same way that we often side with our friends without really knowing the 'other side'.. but therapists are supposed to remain objective even while being nonjudgmental..
i remember this psychologist bdhp and i saw for a while.. he was his psych first and they eventually brought me in.. he had been encouraging my husband to express his frustration and anger with him instead of me since i was not able to handle it well..
well, by the time i came into the picture i was clearly the villain!
at one point bdhp was so surprised at how i was viewed in that way.. thinking that he was just safe to 'vent' there.. not.
as time went on the psych and i got along really well.. it cleared, but it shows that even the pros can side too much with their client to the detriment of the success of the client's actual relationship/marriage..
it will do her no service if her counselor is just holding her hand and nodding through this..
i don't know if this helps, but i just got to a point where i realized that i wouldn't have the kind of intimacy i'd like with my husband.. but i knew he did love me and was trying.. so i have been able to appreciate and accept him as he is..
when that breaks down it is often the last straw..
take care,
ghost
i'm waiting for the internet service guys to show up to change our provider.. of course they showed up early to hook up new phone lines and put up the satellite dish.. both times caught us unprepared.. now that i'm ready for them and waiting.. it's a noshow..
on a better note the voting has begun over at sweetaddy for the t-shirt design.. keep your fingers x'd for mine..
hey pete..
sounds like you're on the right track..
it is often true that some therapists do not 'challenge' their clients like others do.. to examine their own part in problematic matters.. in the same way that we often side with our friends without really knowing the 'other side'.. but therapists are supposed to remain objective even while being nonjudgmental..
i remember this psychologist bdhp and i saw for a while.. he was his psych first and they eventually brought me in.. he had been encouraging my husband to express his frustration and anger with him instead of me since i was not able to handle it well..
well, by the time i came into the picture i was clearly the villain!
at one point bdhp was so surprised at how i was viewed in that way.. thinking that he was just safe to 'vent' there.. not.
as time went on the psych and i got along really well.. it cleared, but it shows that even the pros can side too much with their client to the detriment of the success of the client's actual relationship/marriage..
it will do her no service if her counselor is just holding her hand and nodding through this..
i don't know if this helps, but i just got to a point where i realized that i wouldn't have the kind of intimacy i'd like with my husband.. but i knew he did love me and was trying.. so i have been able to appreciate and accept him as he is..
when that breaks down it is often the last straw..
take care,
ghost
and I don't do well with other people in my home 
family gatherings are always so difficult. After 4 years of therapy with 3 different psychologists.... it's concluded that I'm the misfit of my family. They are(well except for one brother-- who is a lost alcoholic) loud- outspoken and have skin the thickness of tree bark. My one brother and I are the quiet, sensitive thin skinned misfits. And my mom makes sure to point out my differences in condescending ways when family get together-- it hurts so much. 